Sunday, February 3, 2008

Venting the spleen

I have punched the crap out of 2 loads of bread dough ( they're meekly begging for mercy), scrubbed the bathroom AND dunny with excessive vigor (oh so sweetly scented with fire and brimstone) and I'm still mildly irritated.

I am legally blind. And no, not of the wine bottle variety (damn it).
I have NO periphieral vision -you could sneak up beside me with a baseball bat and I wouldn't see you.
I can see vague blobby shapes- if they move then I assume they're people.
I am typing this with my nose 5 mm from the monitor (gives new meaning to "up close and personal"!).
I had a review by my Opthamologist/surgeon (who has a nation-wide reputation as one of the best) to confirm what I eyesight is getting even more shittier, coz there aint no cure.

So it amazes me when people who've met me only twice are suddenly experts on vision and declare to all and sundry "she's not that blind".
Really ? When did they start handing out medical degrees in Cornflakes packets?
Or should I fall over a lot and use my #$%^ing white cane (that I loathe to death but is really handy for battering the ankles of shoppers who crowd me) just for their benefit?
Maybe I should get behind the wheel of a car (which I'm not allowed to do as authorities have issues with dangerous things like that for some reason) and take these imbeciles for a drive, as they're so convinced in my sightedness?!

Or when people (again with those Cornflake packet degrees) claim my son doesn't have Autism/ Tourettes/ ADHD , et al.
Come on home with us after a day out and, after scraping yourself out from under the battered walls and having bruises/cuts/breaks attended to (perhaps they could see to it themselves as they've got so much medical experience), try and repeat that statement!

Yes, I'll be over this shitty mood tomorrow and laugh at these morons but today the bread and you get to be my spleen venting trampoline wink


  1. Feeling a bit better now? You are supposed to put a pinch of love into your cooking, not anger and spleen, but I'm sure the bread will be ok anyway.

    You've go it pretty tough, haven't you.

  2. Oh Jayne,
    I'm so sorry that people are being judgemental. I really hate that. I do.
    It is sadly a human condition. People can't seem to help themselves.

    Biggest of hugs to you.
    Thank you for talking about this on your blog though. Otherwise we would never have known. It is a big thing to let your emotions show in the blogging universe.

  3. Thanks Andrew and Tiff.
    The bread is still edible!
    I haven't really got it tough or I don't think of it that way. I just had a bad night with the Feral Beastie offspring, buggerall sleep and a phone call from an idiot that broke the camel's back.
    A nana-nap and strong cups of tea worked their wonders ;)

  4. I am sorry you have the judgemental jerks to deal with as well as blindness.
    Sharing personal details helps fellow bloggers do the same and also helps us to reach out.

    I can relate on a few levels.Today you touched me for being so honest about your despair but also your amazing strength and humour in dealing with the shirtiness of it.

    Getting off you chest helps so please keep blogging about it and glad the bread tastes good.
    I have a little something for you over at my blog.

  5. Thanks Baby~Amore and thank you very much for the lovely award on your blog :)

    I do usually laugh those sorts of things off but today it was a combination of things on top of being knackered that saw me vent away.
    I'll try to share happier things in the future lol ;)

  6. Whinge whinge whinge,some people think life is just soooo hard,I stubbed my toe this morning,do you think I whinged,too bloody right I did,,it's good to have a rant "OCCASIONALLY" it's very cathartic,keep smiling Jayne.

  7. Jayne that cat has won me over I'm hooked

  8. Seeing that we are having a "Vent Spleen" time I have more or less retired,SDS said I had to cut down the amount of work because of my heart,wake up this morning,thinking great a bit of a lay in,won't have to shave wander down and get the paper,SDS comes in "What are you doing,Ive got jobs for you" gees I hate gardening.

  9. Some days just suck beyond belief. Good luck in dealing with it Jayne.

  10. LMAO Gav good to see you again :)
    That gardening never ends, does it? lol. Retirement really means working like buggery around the home ;)

    Thanks Natalie but Life is sweet,whatever way you look at it ;)

  11. G'day Jayne,
    sounds like you've had a shyte week...

    Never mind,
    some of us don't need to be visually challenged to be bad drivers, as you well know with me, (ie killing cockroaches while driving down the the black spur at night) Strange, you have never wanted to get in a car with me since...
    Mind you my reputation as a bad driver came into its own last week when the steering wheel column snapped....(be afraid, very,very afraid..)

    And the reason why everyone thinks your eyesight is not so bad is because you do a hell of a lot despite it, bugger, it you have an attitude of if someone tells you, you can't, you give it a bloody good go, despite them . So keep sticking it up the knockers and doubters.

    Bout time you took your fury out on the garden....