Friday, October 31, 2008

Trivial History November 1

Now listen carefully, I will say this only once -
Dad avoided collecting Mum's ashes from the funeral people for months but I finally got him to sign a release so I could pick her up (so to speak).
Popped down, collected her and called in to see an old friend on the way back.
She opened the door, talking on the phone, as I waved the box at her and said,
"Put the kettle on, Mum's parched for a cuppa"
The person on the other end of the line, another old friend, asked what was going on.
"Jayne's popped in with her Mum for a cuppa tea," my friend explained.
"But...I thought her mum died a few months ago?"
"Oh she did, Jayne's just picked her ashes up and they've called in on the way,"
"And...you're making her mother, her cremated mother, a cuppa tea?!" screeched our friend's voice.
"Yep, but I don't think she'll want seconds," my friend quipped.
* Please don't email me to tell me what a horrid daughter I am - I'm already aware of that fact.
My mother shared my warped sense of humour so would have enjoyed the scene had she been able.
Actually, she was probably watching from above, demanding a second cup.

Tis The Day of The Dead, All Soul's Day, All Saints' Day, All Hallow's Day, Day of the Awakeners, Day of The Banshee (that would be me), Day of Feeding the Dead, World Vegan Day and the beginning of Movember.

1789 Things were pretty crook in the new colony of NSW when rations were cut down by 1/3.
No more munchies in the chain gang, lads.

1791 20 male and 1 female convicts decided to road-test Shanks' Pony when they did a runner from Parramatta and tried to walk to China.
Sadly they didn't make it in time for the Beijing Olympics.

1792 The first foreign trading vessel to pop into Sydney Cove, the American Brigatine "Philadelphia", parked her prow and flashed her goods at the colony; Gov Phillips bought up much of the rum, meat and tar.

1833 Escaped convict John Graham got tired of the hide and seek game he'd been playing since 1827, said hoo roo to the Aborigines who'd put up with his snoring all those years, returned to Moreton Bay with the greeting, "Honey, I'm home"

1838 Colonial Postmaster General in Sydney James Raymond had a light bulb moment when he introduced pre-paid postage to the Land of Oz, the first of it's kind anywhere in the world.

1876 The Provincial NZ Govt was sent packing with 64 counties taking the place of the previous 9 provinces.

1898 Another Kiwi world first with the first old age pensions offered to those of good character.(that wouldn't be me).

1903 Kiwi train buffs were aglow with rapture when the Christchurch to Invercargill rail express began tootling along.

1906 NZ's International Exhibition played show and tell to the masses when it opened in Hagley Park. Over 1 million souls visited and a branch railway line was built across North Hagley Park to meet the demand.

1914 The First AIF, with Aussies and Kiwis, sailed from Albany, Westralia to Egypt and war.
This was the very last glimpse of Oz for 2 out of every 3 of those boys.

1923 The Melbourne Police Strike was in full swing, with the govt dismissing the strikers while not-so-merry mayhem was the order of the day throughout Melbourne as the hoodlums ran amok.
And people crave the good old days..?

1951 All Aborigines who held certificates of citizenship were able to vote in Westralia.
Trouble was, there wasn't a decent bugger around worth voting for.

1967 Warbler Tina Arena was found in the gladioli patch in Moonee Ponds.

1971 The Victorian Parliament, in their great wisdom, legislated to grant the first late-night shopping in the Kingdom of Oz.

1972 Actress Toni Collette wasn't quite up to being Muriel but she was working on it whe she was dropped off by the stork in Blacktown, NSW.

1988 Just for Lee - Holy Sheep Shyte, Batman! The dastardly readers voted Batman's sidekick Robin off into the sunset and thus he was blasted into the stratosphere with dynamite in the Batman comic number 428.

1989 The National Army Memorial in ANZAC Parade, Canberra was dedicated by the Gov-Gen.
It commemorates the service of the Australian Army in all wars.

1993 That blue/grey plastic thing that barely buys a cup of coffee these days, the $10 note, began fluttering out of pockets and into cash registers on this day.

8 comments:

Andrew said...

Good chuckle over you Mother's ashes tale. It's not like you didn't care! I reckon you would have made sure the tea was the finest Robur.

My maternal grandfather was sworn in as a Special Constable. Not sure he actually did anything though, and I didn't care for his strike breaking politics anyway.

ELIZABETH said...

My mother would have approved.
Love it.

Brian Hughes said...

"And...you're making her mother, her cremated mother, a cuppa tea?!"

Just so long as you didn't set the urn down right next to the tea caddy...nasty accidents can happen that way.

Jayne said...

My friend and I often chuckle over it, Andrew ;)
I must look up those Special Constables and see what functions they performed.

Ta, Elizabeth ;)

Could be messy like the burglar who broke into a house, thought he'd found cocaine but actually snorted the dogs ashes instead, Brian!

Marita said...

Too funny about your mums ashes. I hope it was an excellent cup of tea :)

Lee said...

It was for the best though :)

One dead Robin has created years of tortured storyline.

He only lost by a few votes too.

Bettina said...

lmao!! And just what's wrong with taking your mum's ashes for a cuppa?

Well done!

jeanie said...

That is a great story about your mum's ashes.

In Sierra Leone, you should have then tipped some of the tea on the ground for "libations" - so she could really have enjoyed!

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