Thursday, December 25, 2008

Merry Trivial History Christmas

 Malid Majid....Feliz Navidad...Gun Tso Sun Tan 'Gung Haw Sun...Glaedelig Jul...Nadelik looan na looan blethen noweth...Vrolijk Kerstfeest en een Gelukkig Nieuwjaar...Fröhliche Weihnachten...Kala Christouyenna... E ku odun, e ku iye'dun...
440 AD The Christian Church thought the Roman celebration of the Winter (Summer in the Southern Hemisphere) Solstice was a bit naughty so they plonked on December 25 as Christ's birthday.

Mo'adim Lesimkha...Kellemes Karacsonyi unnepeket...Selamat Hari Natal...Nollaig Shona Dhuit...Buone Feste Natalizie...Shinnen omedeto...Natale hilare et Annum Faustum...Prieci'gus Ziemsve'tkus un Laimi'gu Jauno Gadu...Chuc Mung Giang Sinh...Nadolig Llawen...
1814 Samuel "The Flogging Parson" Marsden (you're allowed to giggle, Evyl)  propped himself on Oihi Beach and gave what was (incorrectly) recorded as the first European Christian service in NZ.

Heughliche Winachten un 'n moi Nijaar...Sreken Bozhik...IL-Milied It-tajjeb...Meri Kirihimete...Bikpela hamamas blong dispela Krismas na Nupela yia i go long yu...Maligayan Pasko....Wesolych Swiat Bozego Narodzenia....Mata-Ki-Te-Rangi....
1859 Thomas Austin was a very naughty boy but Santa didn't know that at the time (coz Santa was too full of eggnog) so when the ship Lightning docked in Port Melbourne with his live cargo Tommy wasn't struck down by lightning but successfully transported his imported animals back to his home, Barwon Park in Winchelsea, but some of the buggers escaped and caused the mother of all ecological headaches.
Yes, boys and girls, Tommy was playing with rabbits.

Bellas festas da nadal e bun onn...Sarbatori vesele or Craciun fericit...Pozdrevlyayu s prazdnikom Rozhdestva is Novim Godom...souksan van Christmas...Wjesole hody a strowe nowe leto....Priecigus Ziemassvetkus...Ojenyunyat Sungwiyadeson honungradon nagwutut...Shub Naya Baras...Christmas-e- Shoma Mobarak...

1864 Canterbury's first stone-built church, the Durham Street Methodist Church, was officially opened.

Gledhilig jol og eydnurikt nyggjar...Hyvaa joulua...Bo Nada...Idah Saidan Wa Sanah Jadidah...Mithag Crithagsigathmithags...Sung Tan Chuk Ha...souksan van Christmas...Linksmu Kaledu...Srozhdestvom Kristovym...Naya Saal Mubarak Ho...

1868 Chrissy time is a bad season for bushrangers as the real Captain Starlight (yes, there really was a Captain Starlight outside of Boldrewood's stolen fairy tale Robbery Under Arms) got nicked near Bourke.

Nollick ghennal as blein vie noa...Merry Keshmish...Pulit nadal e bona annado...Bon Pasco...En frehlicher Grischtdaag un en hallich Nei Yaahr...Feliz Navidad y un Venturoso Año Nuevo...Bellas festas da nadal e bun onn... Legreivlas fiastas da Nadal e bien niev onn...

1891 The Temple of Truth, in Christchurch, had its foundation stone laid on rather rocky foundations as nothing was truthful about the Temple, it was all a fraudulent con.
Read more about it HERE.

Sarbatori vesele...Craciun fericit...Buorrit Juovllat...La Maunia Le Kilisimasi Ma Le Tausaga Fou...Bonu nadale e prosperu annu nou...Geseënde Kersfees...Een Plesierige Kerfees...Rehus-Beal-Ledeats...Gezur Krislinjden...Shenoraavor Nor Dari yev Pari Gaghand...

1914/1915 In the midst of madness, mayhem and murder, mankind sought an end to the senseless slaughter of WW1 when the true spirit of Christmas oh so briefly won out against the blood-thirsty power-hungry maniacs destroying the world when the unofficial Christmas Truce found German, British and French soldiers exchanging Christmas wishes and gifts, playing games, drinking each others' health and attending church services together.
Celebrated in song HERE.
All regiments/battalions had to be split up and sent elsewhere as they couldn't shoot an enemy they'd discovered was just as human as themselves.

Tezze Iliniz Yahsi Olsun...Selamat Hari Natal...Zorionak eta Urte Berri On...Shuvo Naba Barsha...Vesele Vanoce...Cestit Bozic i Sretna Nova godina...Nedeleg laouen na bloavezh mat...Tchestito Rojdestvo Hristovo...Bon Nadal i un Bon Any Nou...Kung His Hsin Nien bing Chu Shen Tan...

1930 Sidney Myer (who founded that department store Myers) was a damn decent bloke who gave 12,000 poor,destitute people a proper Chrissy dinner at the Exhibition Building.

Nitak Hollo Chito...Feliz Navidad y Próspero Año Nuevo...Pace e salute...Rot Yikji Dol La Roo...Mitho Makosi Kesikansi...Sretan Bozic...Prejeme Vam Vesele Vanoce a stastny Novy Rok...Christmas-e- Shoma Mobarak...Jutdlime pivdluarit ukiortame pivdluaritlo...Gajan Kristnaskon...

1952 Just to remind us what the Isle of Oz climate is really all about....drought was grinding Qld, Westralia and NT under its boot heel.

Rõõmsaid Jõulupühi...Melkin Yelidet Beaal...Gledhilig jol og eydnurikt nyggjar....Hyvaa joulua...Joyeux Noel...Buorrit Juovllat...Bonu nadale e prosperu annu nou...Hristos se rodi...Sretan Bozic or Vesele vianoce...Buorrit Juovllat....Noeliniz Ve Yeni Yiliniz Kutlu Olsun...
1974 Cyclone Tracy ensured Santa Never Made It Into Darwin.

Nollaig chridheil huibh...Hristos se rodi...Subha Aluth Awrudhak Vewa...Vesele Vianoce...Vesele Bozicne Praznike Srecno Novo Leto or Vesel Bozic in srecno Novo leto...Ett Gott Nytt År....Maligayamg Pasko...Nathar Puthu Varuda Valthukkal...Neekiriisimas annim oo iyer seefe feyiyeech...Sawadee Pee Mai...

2005 Melbourne had the coldest Chrissy day on record with a massive peak of 14.5 degrees Celcius (58 F) which I can attest to as The Spouse and I shivered all the way home after our night shift on radio, expecting to see the ice land bridge forming at Flinders Street station and polars bears frolicking about the HQ coffee bar....



  1. Came by to wish you and yours the best life has to offer over Christmas. Please pass our thoughts onto your family.
    Even on Christmas Day you delight me with your history post. What more could a girl ask for?
    Have a good one hon....

  2. "The Christian Church thought the Roman celebration of the Winter (Summer in the Southern Hemisphere) Solstice was a bit naughty..."

    Ahem...not strictly speaking the christian church, was the Emperor Constantine what did it. And it wasn't so much the Roman celebration of the winter solstice, as the Sun God Mithra's rebirth festival, Constantine being a Mithra worshipper in a way it was Roman, but not classically so. Mithraism actually began in Persia or somewhere about 400 years previously, although it was very widespread by the time that Constantine made Rome the head of the Christian church. I think Santa had a hand in it all somewhere as well...something to do with the red and white outfit symbolising blood and guts or something. I'm not sure now. Another few eggnogs and I might remember.

    Anyhow, Merry Christmas/Pagan midwinter festival of your choice! Bottoms up and down the hatch and all that!

  3. It's a good thing that I am allowed to giggle.

    Feliz Navidad, Prospero Ano, y Felicidades!!!

  4. Thanks, Moe, you have a ripper day yourself ;)

    Sweet black tea was called for then, Brian :P

    Here's looking up your old address, Evyl! Cheers :)

  5. Merry Christmukkahatheologististikanlan, Jayne.

  6. Hope you and your family had a fantastic day, Jayne. xxx

  7. And the same to you in spades, Reuben :P

    Hope you had as much fun as we did, Guera, thanks ;) Mwah!

  8. I had the obligatory religious argument with a pack of God botherers last night. 'Twas a hoot. First sober Christmas I've had in years. Yay for double shifts.

  9. Chrissy spirit, from a bottle, sometimes makes those nuff-nuffs so much more tolerable, Anja ;)