Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Trivial History December 23

Am oddly calm and settled, looking forward to Thursday as a casual, laid-back, no fuss day....now that THE Party is behind me.
I'm still waiting for the panic that I've forgotten someone for a pressie to hit.....wait, here it comes.......yep, the impossible-to-buy-for-future-son-in-law has a gaping hole under the frilly angel tree.
Now, ladies and gentlemen, the future-son-in-law is promising to buy a motorbike sometime in the New Year.
Long story short ; my fiancee was killed on a motorbike through no fault of his own and I have a slight aversion to them now.
Do we, his future parents-in-law...
A) Nail his feet to the floor?
B) Shackle him in the stocks until he gets tired of the nose bleeds from bending down such a long distance?
C) Take him on a tour of the Orthopedic/General Surgical/Rehab wards?
or
D) All of the above whilst slapping him repeatedly in the face with a wet fish until he changes his mind and sticks to his Camaro convertible?

1761 Pickle the (Scottish) spy did die.
I've often wondered if he was enjoying a few too many jars at his local when a bottle of pickles inspired his overly-lubricated thought processes....

1840 Twas not a festive season for Edward Davis and his gang of 5 who were captured as bushrangers and sentenced to hang.
I'm guessing there wouldn't have been second helpings of plum pudd for that lot.

1843 The first Aussie newspaper, The Sydney Gazette, collapsed....this is what happens when you employ second-rate glue and staff who suffer attacks of the vapours!

1863 The first Sydney trams, horse-drawn thingames, trotted along behind the collective Dobbins in Pitt Street from Circular Quay alllllll the way to Redfern Station. (*snigger* Getting off at Redfern = coitus interruptus).

1874 The drinkers of Perth rejoiced with the establishment of the Swan Brewery in Perth.
*hic*

1876 Lyttelton's time-ball station began pole dancing popping up and down to relay the time to ships in the harbour.

1911 George Bolt was a clever clogs who designed and built a glider then put his money where his mouth was by flying it from the Cashmere Hills above Christchurch.

1914 Drought...again....in a severe and protracted fashion squirrel gripped most of the Land of Oz.

1953 QE II and Phil the Greek graced The Land of The Long White Cloud with their presence during their royal Summer tour.

1976 Take one deep breath and blow into this tube in a continuous fashion until we tell you to stop...Random Breath Testing started in Victoria and was a joy to use in alcohol rehab (especially for the staff post-Chrissy drinks party).
*hic*

11 comments:

Brian Hughes said...

"Random Breath Testing started in Victoria..."

That's on way of wheedling out the asthmatics.

Andrew said...

Motor Bike nearly killed one of my brothers, a bicyle the other. Put your hand down with a firm foot.

Dina said...

Sorry about your fiance.

I think you should do all of the above (a-d)

ELIZABETH said...

http://improbable.com/2008/07/16/update-project-grizzly-suit-sold/6bd6_1/

If this works it's a link to a photo of the fellow and the suit he made. Could be a bit awkward on a bike but it does look protective!

Marita said...

All of the above. Motorbikes riders are not always the problem, it is the people in cars who think they are invincible and don't watch out for motorbikes or bicycles.

miss diarist said...

What does your daughter think, Jane? Marita is right, it's often the lack of awareness of other road users that leads to problems for bikers.

Tom had a motorbike when we met; thankfully it went to bike heaven shortly thereafter. He knows better than to raise the topic of a new one with me.

Jayne said...

Yes, coz those asthmatics cause so many car accidents with their wheezing into the windscreen, Brian :P

Or firm foot up a particular backside, Andrew?

Ta, Dina.

The link didn't work but I can imagine it, Elizabeth!

Exactly, Marita.

The daughter isn't too happy, MD, but the future-son-in-law is beginning to get defensive whenever the subject is raised so there's not a lot of discussion room.

anodyne Brownie said...

dear Jayne - much sympathy to you for your personal tragedy.
Cars are a lethal threat to bikeriders.
My son was wiped out while riding to work, when a woman pulled out from the kerb without looking or indicating. 12 months in physio and now he wears a handbrace. The payout bought him a house of course.
I sat on the road at 3am with a police cyclist who had been hit by a car at 3am in Sth yarra. His leg ripped off at the thigh, was in the gutter still wearing the big thick butch cycle-boot. The ambo dropped the lot into a big plastic bag.
Do not let your loved ones get on a bike - the cars are lurking.

Invitation for you at my other blog.

wishing you a cool YULE

angel gurl said...

Thing is I get where you are coming from but the more pressure you put on him about this issue the more he will dig his toes in. It's a hard one to balance out hopefully with time this issue will resolve itself.

miss diarist said...

Gah, just realised I called you Jane instead of your righful name! I blame the tonsilitis. And send apologies, I hate it when my own name is misspelled.

Jayne said...

Thanks Brownie, that is so true and sad.
Love the invite! :)

Yep, Janine, I'm not touching it with a barge pole.

Tis ok MD, I'll spare you the whip this Chrissy :P

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