Thursday, August 6, 2009

August 7 and we can hide the men in the furniture, girls, no one will ever know!

Was mighty impressed to see an ad for furniture with built in storage to hide the hoover, iron, mother-in-law and kitchen sink.
I'd be the one begging the family and guests,
"No, no, really, please, stay seated, I'm not in the mood for ironing, no, sit, please keep your bums on the couch. I SAID SIT DOWN BEFORE I GLUE YOUR ARSES TO THE CHAIR!....More cake?"
Pecan danish, perhaps?

All the boys and girls of Fife will be galloping madly about in the annual Hat and Ribbon Race.
So, don't panic, it's not the herd of elephants escaped from the zoo...again....

1858 Scotch College and Melbourne Grammar fielded teams of 40 players each on a pitch 800 mts long to play Aussie Rules to complete the old Aussie jingle "Football, meat pies, kangaroos and Holden cars".

1908 The first train tootled it's was the whole entire length of the NZ North Island Main Trunk Line.
Read more about the gorgeous steam train HERE.

1912 The poor Brit migrant kiddies were a lucky bunch when Kingsley Fairbridge opened a farm school at Pinjarra, Westralia, and saw the potential for under-paid and over-worked child labour their education.

1912 The famous Aussie icon the Akubra hat was first registered.
This hat uses bunnies.
Yes, that is a bunny's arse stretched across someone's head.
Yet Alannah Hill gets threats for using the bunny-wunny fluffy fur.
Hmm...rabbits have driven many native flora and fauna species to extinction, turned fertile land into wasteland, screw themselves (and the average Aussie) multiple times per day yet some dropkick thinks they should be protected.
Yeah, only if the little bunnikins are on my plate in a rich Gruyere sauce surrounded by lashings of rissotto, spinach and shaved carrot.

1915 The Aussies charged The Nek, the Kiwi's charged Chunuk Bair resulting in much dead, dying and wounded in The Pissing Contest To End All Pissing Contests.

1994 The Tasty Nightclub Raid.
Wrong on so many levels.
Read about it HERE.

3 comments:

Brian Hughes said...

"...an ad for furniture with built in storage to hide the hoover, iron, mother-in-law and kitchen sink."

We have something similar. It's called the cupboard under the stairs.

River said...

Bugger, Brian beat me to it.

Furniture with built in storage=cupboards.
I sometimes wished I could hide my mother-in-law on a rocketship to anywhere.

Jayne said...

There's just something about the thought of sitting on the old biddy that appeals to me.
And the possibility of farting on her that appeals to my immature side :P

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