That teen who nicked a tram and rhetorical questions only commonsense can answer

I wonder if he's working as a tram driver yet, that teen who nicked the tram a few years back?
The tram head honchos did promise him a job when he hit his majority, age 18.
It eventually came out in the media he had a more-than-slight obsession that saw him try to nick other trams, a train and the odd bus.
I'd love to think he was finally in charge of the trams he loved...well, not exactly in charge but at least driving one without asking passengers if they'd prefer a different route or over-shooting stops lol.
Found another news article HERE with more details.
But then again this just highlights the fact that so many kids are not being diagnosed or getting the help they need.
Stories in the media of mentally ill people not getting the medical attention they need until they hit the gaol cells where they get as much attention as they need but they wouldn't be there in the first place if they'd got the care on the frigging outside, before they'd hurt themselves/others/caused damage,etc.
Is it just me or does that make sense?
Why is it that to attend a special education school (in Vic at least) kids must have an IQ of 70 or below but when kids with higher IQs and learning problems hit the mainstream schools the Ed Dept moved the goal-posts a few years back to make it harder for kids to meet the criteria for funding for classroom assistance?
Why is it that there's not enough funding in the city for early intervention programs and sweet Fanny Adams in the rural/regional areas where there are just as many kids with learning/developmental difficulties?
Why is it that even under private healthcare the mentally ill are only entitled to 2 weeks hospital admission before the fund starts to cut back on the payments?
Under public healthcare the turn around from admission to discharge would make your head spin.
How many mental health issues do you figure are solved/addressed in those time frames?
Yep, fuck all and nothing, not even band-aid solutions.
So, we take a snapshot of Aboriginal literacy and numeracy (Feral Beast's current research subject) and apply it across the board - you have white/black/purple/brindle kids who fall through the cracks and have little or no literacy/reasoning skills due to learning/developmental difficulties.
They go on to

• remain on welfare.
• be employed in low-paid work.
• have poor self-image.
• have poor social skills.
• remain in the lowest 10% of wage earning.
• set an example for their children to follow.
• be at high risk of alcohol/drug abuse.
• be at high risk of breaking the law.
• be at high risk of spending time in gaol.
  
• have poor eating habits leading to health issues.
• more likely to die before their children due to health issues complicated by lifestyle choices.
• more likely to contract preventable diseases due to poor education/awareness of vaccination programs/preventable measures.
• be at high risk of ABI requiring on-going full-time care due to poor anger management and/or being involved on a regular basis in alcohol/drug fuelled fights.
  
• more likely to contribute to property/community damage.
• high risk of being involved in injury/death of another person.

The above costs the tax payer, each individual personally effected and the following generations forever because the attitude is "if mum/dad didn't read/write/complete school why should I?".
All for the sake of spending a bit extra on kids, ffs.

July 31 Did you know that I'm a bitch?

No?
See, I've broadened your knowledge base already and I haven't even yet begun throwing trivial history facts that occurred on this date in Oz or NZ.

1945 The Custom Minister Richard Keane was anything but keen on the novel Forever Amber when he outlawed it as "an undesirable book".
Big bloody girls blouse.

Just to broaden your mindset a little wider, have a gander at Andrew's blog post on the disgusting fact that this beautiful Art Deco building, Lonsdale House, is to be demolished.
Sort of prompts one to ask why the old Palace/Metro Theatre, with it's rare Byzantine-style of architecture was allowed to be demolished last year....

1965 Sir Rohan Delacombe, who was Guv'na of Victoria, took his missus along for a nice Sat'dee outing when he opened the Puffing Billy Line from Belgrave to Emerald.

1976 John Walker won gold for the Men's 1500 metres for NZ.
More info HERE.

A certain copper-topped lady is ripening into a mellow wine today; you may feel the urge to pop along and wish her Many Whatsits....
I'll just be hiding under the dining table when she comes looking for me, ok?

Worst bushfire season to come - and no one wants to learn from recent screw ups

Spoke to one of my many rural cousins about a month ago ; she said the Henty Hwy from Horsham to Hamilton was 100 miles of bushfire fuel just waiting to go up in flames.
She and many neighbours had tried to contact people but without any luck.
Having just read THIS ARTICLE claiming we're facing the worst bushfire season ever, I hope to Goddess someone, somewhere has a good dose of commonsense knocked into them before the manure hits the proverbial fan and we're left with a repeat of Black Saturday.

July 30, Two years of Brumby

Today we hear that the Royal Flying Doctor Service - a service which has saved countless lives in the Aussie outback, connected many isolated communities, hell, it even inspired a successful TV soapie - is getting kicked to the kerb.
Read the tripe HERE.

1838 Londoners were blessed with a rain of frogs from on high.
I always said there was something amphibious about the Royal Family...
Yes, read it HERE.

1867 The Great Canterbury Snowstorm began.
Read a small account of it HERE.

1924 There was a Royal Commission looking into the pricing of bread, wheat and flour.

1942 Port Hedland in Westralia was bombed by Japanese aircraft.

1967 Arthur Stace, better known as Mr Eternity, dropped off the twig.
Read about this extraordinary man HERE.

1976 The Kiwi Men's Hockey Field Team won gold medals at the Montreal Olympics for their efforts on this day.
More HERE.

1979 Carless Days began in NZ.
Read more about them HERE and HERE.
They'd never work today in Oz as too many umbilical cords have become attached to petrol tanks and legs are merely painted on.

1997 It's been 12 years since the Thredbo landslide killed 18 people leaving Stuart Diver the sole survivor.

2007 Steve Bracks left the office of Victorian Premier leaving John-Boy Brumby to assume the position of Crown Prince of the state.

Crothers Cordial

When you're next in the Yarrawonga neck of woods, track down a bottle of the Crothers Cordial for a decent drink.I had some donkeys years ago and was pleasantly surprised to read that the company is still going strong, albeit in smaller form.
You can read about the bubbles put into each bottle by hand HERE.
Not too many companies can boast the personal touch like that these days in their rush after the Almighty Dollar God.

...you spit like Bon Jovi, we spit like Bon Scott...

Hip hop is not usually my cuppa tea but Aussie hip hop on the other hand is a COMPLETELY different ball game.
Yonks ago (that's ancient slang for a long time ago, kiddies) Triple J started giving Aussie hip hop bands airplay and suddenly the likes of The Wilcannia Mob, Hilltop Hoods, The Herd, 2Up, etc were getting noticed by the mainstream.
I like hearing local issues and the Aussie accent but they also take the piss sometimes (that means poking fun at ourselves, boys and girls, not some odd sexual fetish or Aunty Madge's incontinence).
A couple of my personal favourite presenters on JOY many moons ago used to play Hilltop Hoods on a regular basis, a fav being The Nosebleed Section (yes, the GLBT community likes the same music as straights, I can hear the pepperpot shakers having conniptions) so imagine my surprise to wake up at whatever the ungodly hour was this morning to hear ABC radio 774 playing Hilltop Hoods Fifty in Five!
For those who have nfi what I'm babbling about Hilltop Hoods are an Aussie Hip Hop group out of Adelaide (oh er that staid city of churches is at it again, Mother!) and their latest album State of The Art is roaring up the charts with Fifty in Five being likened as an Aussie hip hop answer to Billy Joel's We Didn't Start The Fire history-type summary song.
Fifty in Five lyrics HERE.
Fan-bloody-tastic!

I'll include some links to the various Aussie hip hop songs featured on YouTube -
The BBQ Song (Bad luck BBQ) Mass MC
Why do I try so hard? 2Up
I was only 19 The Herd (worked with Redgum in re-working the song)
I was only 19 Redgum (original for comparison)
Mango Pickle Down River MIA with The Wilcannia Mob
Nosebleed Section Hilltop Hoods
Fifty in Five Hilltop Hoods

And some of you are probably sitting there scratching your heads wondering why I've included this in a history blog - because some of these songs cover Oz history, events in Oz history, they can be used to teach and illustrate history and the influence on Australia, to show how the Oz hip hop scene has evolved from the USA version and kept much of it's own character, that these could be considered the noughties version of the 1960s folk protest songs and the new form of poetry and, dare I say it, Shakespeare.

Sometimes the history written by the conquerers has more than a grain of truth in it

Feral Beast is, as most of you probably already know, studying some university subjects through Open Universities Australia, some of which have been on Aboriginal history.
It's amazing to learn in his research that there were Aboriginal Peoples in this area, Oakleigh, (oh noez, my stalker will once more know my suburb!) who lived off the fresh water swamps that held masses of fish, eels, yabbis, etc, a tiny less than blink-it-and-miss 150 yrs ago.
Feral Beast in his archaeological digs in the back yard has dug up plenty of tiny shells of a shellfish still found today in fresh/brackish water of swamps, billabongs, etc.

If you figure it that a lifetime is 80 years then only two lifetimes ago Bunurong Aboriginals were living happily here before the white settlers turfed them out.

Not long when you think of it that way, eh?
Most of the area was swamps with trees and shrubs with the usual wallabies and wombats doing their 'eat root and leave' routine - if you wander up Atkinson Street have a gander in the bluestone gutter at the corner of Nelson and Atkinson Streets, make it a dry day or you may not see the natural spring that wends its way through the soil to appear in the gutter.
Water will always find its way, first law of plumbers.
And while you're in that neighbourhood pop into The Avenue off Atkinson Street...just along to your left is a large old oak tree; this was planted in the place of a hollowed out dead red gum that the Bunurong People used as a Meeting Place. They briefly used this oak tree, too, before they got their marching orders.
If you're in a car and heading up FernTree Gully Road, have a good look at the intersection as this is where the Bunurong People once held corroberees and meetings with the Wurundjeri People but don't be afraid to call Glen Waverley by it's original name, Black's Flat; the possessive S was the first to go soon followed by the entire name in the effort of claiming the land for conquering whites hidden behind the simpering political correctness that really wasn't.
What made us snort (in a sarcastic-I-can't-believe-they-swallowed-that-BS type giggle snort) was the fact so many books kept repeating the same lines over and over and over again "The Bunurong People all died out so they closed the Aboriginal Depot at Mordialloc".
Riiiiiiiiight.
So, those girls stolen by the sealers for wives and who had many decendents don't count?
What about all the Bunurong People who moved from the Mordialloc Aboriginal Depot up bush to help establish Coranderrk Mission?
And their decendents must have been figments of everyone's imagination when they were shifted down to Lake Tyers Mission?
The lesson of this surprising research is to keep looking and sometimes you'll find that the accepted, oft-repeated fact is in fact fiction.
After all, we no longer believe the world is flat...do we?

What is, is...what was, will be... what will be, was, and will be again...so sayeth Welcome Back Kotter.

Browsing through the paper and I found an article screaming about Melbourne's trees dying of thirst; how the drought is taking its toll and if the Melb City Council doesn't get special watering permits to save blah blah blah blah....
I read this article where Bobbie Doyle and his band of Merry Money Munchers chose to spend our dosh on buildings rather than drought-proofing trees.
And lotsa moolah on food, too!
 Melb City Council spent $240,000 on a scribble I could do with my glasses tied behind my back.

150 yr old peppercorn trees can be sawn down for developers....and a 400 yr old red gum must make way for cars...putting us on par with the Chinese Govt who is demolishing Kashgar and all of its history  but dead wood that contributes little on the sides of roads except to fuel deadly bushfires is to remain because no one wants to listen or learn from history...like how the Whinging Poms had good reason to whinge when they arrived here....
Poster boy for red cordial Rove McManus made the comment on his show 'Are you smarter than a 5th Grader?' last night that "No one knows Australian History."
No, Rove, I beg to differ....we know what it is popular to know at any given time, after that it's up to each person to educate themselves or keep their heads shoved firmly up their own backsides.

For those who feel this is for them

 

This bottle is being passed around to all those dipshits who can't deal with Life when it jumps up and bites 'em on the arse.

Awww, you're a little bit sooky or a little bit shitty.

So, somewhere in your tiny stir-fried noodle of a brain it makes such perfect sense to start attacking everyone around you just to make you feel better.

Or to drag everyone down to your level of misery just to share the lurve you're feeling.

Cos having a diagnosis of Autism or Asperger's or being anywhere on the Spectrum is SUCH an excuse to grow into the Megabitch from Hell and pick fights with anyone and everyone.

Isn't it?

So get the fuck over the reality and learn to deal with the fact you're on the Spectrum and realise there's a shedload of good company waiting for you to open your eyes to see what support and care there is on offer to you.

And stop pissing me up the wall cos I Won't. Tolerate. Your. Fucking. Crap. ANYMORE.

Hey Hey Ricky - Barmy Army song

Found this catchy tune over at Colin's Adelaide Green Porridge Cafe and I'm loving it!
Click on the link HERE to watch the fun, bright and bouncy video at YouTube.

Hey Hey Ricky, what you gonna do?

Hey Hey Ricky, get on your kangaroo

We're taking back the Ashes, they don't belong to you

Cos we're the Barmy Army, we're England through and throug.

You tried to find a bowler but it ended up in tears

You once had Warne and McGrath now it's just that Brett Lee 'Spears'

You'll try to get a century, but we know how you bat

So go on back down under or we'll bring out Gary Pratt 

Symonds has gone fishing, Gilchrist is long gone

You have got no spinners, we've got Panesar and Swann

You'll always be a whinger, when will you ever learn

You'll never get your hands on our little Ashes urn 

You cook shrimps on the Barbie, drink beer that's really weak

Your country isn't quite as old as some of our antiques

You didn't like our Bodyline, wish Beefy had been yours

Now we've got Freddie and KP to hit sixes and fours

Come on England!

Could not agree with it more at the moment with our piss-weak cricket team, piddly Ponting for a captain and the sooky-la-la Aussie cricket board that gave us such a bloody dogs' breakfast of players while booting out the talent.
Good on the English cricket team if they win the Ashes, they've earned it.

Happy 21st July

 

Look!

Theresa Green!

1809 Daniel Lambert dropped off the twig.
Daniel Lambert was a big boy.
Daniel Lambert had to wait a little to be buried as the pub in which he had been staying had to be pulled apart to remove his body.

1859 The first Melbourne Fire Brigade was founded on this day.
Ironic really when there still isn't enough numbers staffing the stations.

1865 The NZ Governor George Grey oversaw the capture of Weraroa pa.
For further details click HERE.

1951 The All Blacks trounced the Wallabies to win the series 3-0
Again the irony strikes as England whips the Aussie cricket team till they cried like babies.

F-a-a-r-k, Brendan.

That brass monkey ball was a tough nut to crack.

Devotion to Jennifer Saunders and Dawn French

The eldest female offspring adores loves worships Brit comedians Jennifer Saunders and Dawn French; so much so that when I didn't finish reading Dawn's autobiography Dear Fatty fast enough for daughter to borrow she bought her own copy.
She went to see their show last night and waited around for over an hour to see them backstage to get them to "bless" her boobs.
She asked Jennifer to sign the left one but she accidentally signed the right one to which the daughter stated,
"Oh that's ok, that's the fat one and you're Fatty after all,"
French and Saunders were peeing themselves at that, wiping up tears.
So, if they make a comment about some nutter fan naming her boobs after Dawn and Jennifer....

July 20....and Shepparton survived my descent upon it!

My cousin and I went screaming sedately tootling up the Hume Hwy to Shepparton yesterday (Sunday) and had a fine old time at the SPC Ardmona Factory Sales shop.
Crikey Moses, Joseph the carpenter and Nev the concrete koala...!
There are serious savings to be had on really decent food ( not just fruit) and the staff are quite lovely and helpful.
As it was a Sunday the Pental Soaps and Campbell's Soups factories were closed but we're plotting and planning another trip up to take these 2 on sometime soon-ish.
For great Chrissy goodies ( for gift hampers and nibbly party snacks over the silly season) from the SPC Ardmona factory, a little birdie told us November was the time to find extra bargains, specials and savings.
Mark it on your calender and spend the day getting a whole years' worth of groceries in one fell swoop!

 

Proper working Dutch windmill in the middle of the Oz countryside.

Go figure!

1851 Gold was allegedly found at Mt Alexander near Castlemaine.
Allegedly as I have seen none with my own baby blues....unless you want to change my mind by posting some of it to moi?

 

Water tower thingie at Mooroopna

1965 Mt Eden Prison was not rockin' and rollin' to any earthquake or new fangled music but to the riot which broke out when an escape attempt was buggered and a couple of prison warders were taken hostage.
Read more about the riot HERE.

 

Somewhat blurry roadside photography ( car was tootling by at 110kms/p/h) 

Another shot of  Emerald Bank (click HERE for more details on this delicious cafe/train rides/woolshed function centre/heritage farm)

19th means 6 days til Xmas in July ...

I shall be running amok in Shepparton.
As the Presidents of the USA once sang....

Movin to the country gonna eat a lot of peaches
Im movin to the country Im gonna eat me a lot of peaches
Im movin to the country Im gonna eat a lot of peaches
Movin to the country Im gonna eat a lot of peaches
Peaches come from a can they were put there by a man
In a factory downtown
If I had my little way Id eat peaches everyday
Sun soakin bulges in the shade

Though I really think gobbling down gazillions of peaches every day would give you a gut ache or turn your skin orange or make your hair curly.
Or something.

Today the children of Piddinghoe, UK, have a special tea called Little Edith's Treat.
Read about this event (and other quirky Piddinghoe traditions like shoeing magpies) HERE.

1500 A wild, brazen hail storm raged its wicked power so mightily when it vented judgment upon the church that it brought down the ceilings in the Papal Palace in Rome.
Or the tradesmen just hadn't been paid....

1814 Poor old Matthew Flinders popped his clogs at the age of 40.

1860 She who inspired the schoolyard rope jumping rhyme of;

Lizzie Borden took an axe

And gave her mother 40 whacks.

When she saw what she had done

She gave her father 41.

was born on this day in USA.


1916 Battle of Fromelles  ; when too many boys were used as cannon fodder.
To learn more about the bloody battle and how the forgotten mass graves were recently discovered click HERE.

1946 Orange - which isn't famous for oranges, btw - was declared to be a City!
Learn more about this veritable fruit bowl HERE.

1982 The Privy Council ruled on Western Samoan citizenship.
For more details click HERE.

1987 Molly picked up his bat and ball and went home when the ABC axed Countdown.

1988 Jock Orr aka "The Birdman" (as he befriended birds in Cathedral Square) died on this day.
*Tried to verify but no other sources except for CC Library.

1994 The 55th floor of the Rialto Tower was opened by Jeff Kennett.
It's an observation deck for those who can't Gurgle it.

Yes, shall I call or will you so we may be 'motored out to inspect' this simply marvellous South Australian bungalow with it's 'pretty mantles and tiled hearths'?

Found it in the July 19th, 1916 newspaper...I'm sooooooooo certain it will still be available....and even still standing knowing developers of late!

18th July Did You Know...?

...that stuff happened.
Yes, it did.
It happened on the this day, the day before this day and the day after this day.
Up until midnight and beyond.
Amazing, huh?

1855 Get up close and personal with some Kiwi philately, boys and girls.
Yes, The Land of The Long Twilight had its first postage stamps on sale to the hoi polloi.
And Philatelists.

1881 What eventually became Sydney's Prince Henry's Hospital started life as a sanitary camp at Little Bay for those suffering during a small pox epidemic.
Gotta love the desperation born from pestilence!

1884 Ferdinand von Hochstetter, who led the way when he studied and wrote about NZ's geology, passed beyond The Shakey Isles.
Read more about his life HERE.

1924 George Michael...(Gotta have faith)...Prendergast slipped into the slinky yet silky styled mantle of Premier of Victoria.
Ner ner, made you guess then .

1966 Playschool dipped its round window into the turbid airwaves of telly when it debuted on the ABC in Oz.

July 16...until midnight

I have been missing of late, the computer having been taken control of by small green aliens my son to complete his diabolical assignment that is driving me to drink coffee and sew small furry creatures out of felt.
Yes, soon I will be surrounded by all of the usual woodland creatures and then some not thought up in a stitchers worst nightmare.
Purple polka dot ponies really should have wings or horns or something....

Today is "Talk To A Telemarketer".
LMFAO
Yeah, right, they don't stop talking to me day in, day out!

1439 Kissing was banned in England to stop the spread of disease and pestilence.
Not too keen on disease but pestilence was good to me in the Middle Ages.

1800 The good reverends Richard Johnson and Samuel Marsden opened a school at Kissing Point, Ryde.
For further (interesting) information and details of the Kissing Point area click HERE.

1813 Proving that inadequate sentencing isn't something recent -
Two officers of the 73rd Regiment were found guilty of killing a settler and were given a piddly six month gaol sentence each.
Public outcry, like it does now, ensued.

1855 The Theatre Royal was officially opened in Melbourne and costing a pretty penny at £95,000 sterling wonderful visionary George Coppin soon went bust.
But not for long!
To have a gander at the long lost Theatre Royal in Bourke Street click HERE (scroll down page).

1962 The rot set in with the strike by parents and the community that resulted in the closure of Catholic schools in Goulburn which triggered the public funding of private schools.
More information click HERE.

1965 NZ's 161 Battery opened fire in Vietnam to support the American 173rd Airborne Brigade in the Vietnam War.
For further information click HERE.

1972 The Gay Liberation Front in Wellington was established; it was active for six years.

2003 A medical study was published by The Cancer Council of Australia which found that masturbation may help prevent prostate cancer.
Proving that there is a method in the Goddesses madness in giving breath to wankers.

Brain in melt down, send spare!

Feral Beast has another assignment due, computer has been taken over, updates will be a tad late until my brain works again.
Have taken to drinking coffee....with MILK again.
Send chocolate ...please?

July 14 fireworks

I've been tripping out all over a certain popular meeting application online - think about it and you'll figure it out - where I've reconnected with long lost cousins (8 so far and counting), found some who'd been hidden from us (Gawd, that makes us sounds like a cult....ahem) and a 3rd cousin who could pass for Feral Beast's identical twin.
No, we're not from deepest, darkest Tassie, we do not have two heads and we all have a thoroughly diversified gene pool.
Although strange uncle Rufus loved his herd of cattle just that wee bit too much for some of our liking....
KIDDING, please don't send emails.
Last time that happened my heart went all a'flutter and I squealed in a register that had dogs whining 2 streets away...over emails that offered to make my 'manhood' bigger, longer, faster, stronger.
Last time I looked I was a chick - although this may have changed since May 1997 -so I may decline the invite to "give it to her harder than ever before".
Really.
No, really, stop asking.
And don't offer me any "inheritance" if I just cough up my bank details.
That sooooooo isn't winning you any brownie points in this gin joint.Stop whispering sweet nothings in my ear, my "innocent Nubian princess" who only needs my money to "flee from her torture to be free".
And seriously, posing as a banking institution I do NOT bank with and demanding my personal ID details is just a tad obvious, even from the angle I'm at trying to check if I am still a chick....(pass the mirror, will you, I can't reach with my ankles behind my ears....)

1842 Before Brisvegas became Brisvegas they were flogging off town allotments for filthy lucre.
Somehow the price of land kept rising when they twigged that it wasn't being made anymore.

1853 NZ's first general election began.
Find out more HERE and HERE.

1950 Sir Apirana Ngata, who helped resurrect the Maori language and culture, passed away on this day.
More info on this inspiring gentleman HERE and HERE.

1986 SpongeBob SquarePants was...errr....delivered by the squid.

1995 The Australian Aboriginal Flag and Torres Strait Island flag were made official flags of Oz.
About f'ken time, sunshine.

3 samples of why Oz will never have a Black History Month like USA

1905 The King Edward Barracks in Christchurch, which did service as town hall, dance hall and all-rounder for each civic turn out, was begun to be built, with the industrious chippies and builders finishing the job in 25 days.
Can't get workers like that these days!
For a pic of it being built click HERE.

Some items Feral Beast unearthed in his studies today.
I imagine most of you will feel as sickened as we are.

1916 Vivian Walsh was the first to obtain a pilot's licence whilst residing ( ohh, doesn't that sound salubrious?) in the country known as New Zealand (must be read with a plum jammed into your cheek for best results).
To find out more about Mr Walsh and his brother who trained at least 100 pilots who saw combat in WW1 click HERE and HERE.

 

1945 Ben Chifley took on the mantle of Aussie PM, the 16th silly bugger to do so.
More about grand old Ben HERE.

Goodness, Mr O'Conor, you mean to say your parish priest/minister wasn't preaching from the pulpit to encourage you to act like the sonofabitch you were?
Golly gosh, how about that.
And they in their ivory towers wonder why there's such a high rate of illiteracy.
Truly dumb.

Torchwood Twilight Talk July 12

Am slightly bemused after the finale of Torchwood last night (am writing this, as always, the night before so you're getting a fresh impression).
Is it the final ever finale of Torchwood?
If that was the intention it would be a perfect swan song.
But Russell T. Davies is determined to keep us all guessing by having announced series 4 of Torchwood is ready to go.
Go where, exactly, Russ mate?!
You've killed off the 3 co-stars we'd come to love, Gwen's up the duff and the oh-so-delicious Jack has pissed off to the middle of the universe or some such.
I can pretty safely predict that the PM has been kicked to the kerb (Oi, Kev-baby, you taking notes?), that Lois is or should be joining Torchwood, that the gun-happy chicky-babe should get to play with the alien weaponry,and that the damn Torchwood car (that was car jacked on the estate) will, predictably, turn up with some street-smart teen behind the wheel having figured out all the bells and whistles.
Ahem, Russ mate, I'm available for editing and re-writes....

1799 The Combination Act was passed with the brekkie snags in Britain which made outlaws of those naughty boys and girls who dared to try to improve working conditions.
Imagine!
Some of those sweat shop workers just LOVE coughing up half a lung in amongst the cotton fibres and their children EXPECT to lose a few fingers working on those big looms.
You can't change a person's history and their lot in life,  you can't just take away everything they've come to know and expect....

 

Something we all expect our local fire brigades to put their utmost effort into, of course....

1812 The USA invaded Canada during The War of 1812.
Something I doubt Canada was expecting or rated very highly on their To Do List that year.

1846 And they reckon they didn't know how to party or fight in the old days...hmph!
Martial law was declared for ONe Night Only! in good old matronly Marvellous Melbourne when the Orangemen and Roman Catholics took to rioting through the streets - as you do - and *gasp* shots were fired.

1863 Brit troops invaded Waikato when they crossed the Mangatawhiri stream which had been declared as a line that Was Not To Be Crossed or it was to be assumed any breach of the same to be an Act Of War.
Men being the blood-thirsty beasts that they are, War it was, more details HERE.

 

Where oh where did we go wrong....? 

 

2001 Chris Jenner made the whole of the North and South Islands proud ( collectively known as New Zealand but not to volleyball players in Oz) when he won the time trial of stage 5 of the Tour de France.
More info and details HERE.

Sat'dee July 11

Am howling my eyes out as they Xxxxx  xx xxxxxx Xx  xx x Xxx xxx in Torchwood.
*sob*
It's Cheer Up Day and Swimming Pool Day.

It's National Diabetes Week 12th - 18th July.
That might explain why doing a Tim Tam Slam with double choc bikkies in hot chocolate isn't really on any diet sheet.
And why my pancreas tried digging its way out of my body with a blunt spoon.

1302 Battle of The Golden Spurs.
No, sadly it was not a wild sex orgy wrestling match involving whips, bridles and spurs.
*sigh*
Never mind, have a boiled lolly instead....

1836 Thomas Petty - not the future singer of Tom Petty and The Heartbreakers, sorry - opened his fine grog shop Petty's Hotel in York Street in Sydney.

1877 Kiwi Kate Edger was a ballsy gal who was the first female to gain a Uni degree in NZ and was the first chickybabe in the entire Brit Empire to get a BA.
Read more about this trail blazer HERE.

1920 Englishman Charles Stephens tied himself to an anvil within his wooden barrel as ballast just before he pitched himself over Niagara Falls.
His right arm was the only thing that was found within the barrel afterwards.
Ooey gooey was a worm....

1977 Brit mag Gay News was slapped with a £1,000 fine for having the gall to publish a poem that dared *outraged sniff and flaring of the nostrils* to suggest that Jesus Christ may have been gay!
Hey, the bloke mucked around with all these other blokes in dresses in a bois only boys only club, his teen years are vague and most telling of all - he had long hair and a beard!!!

2008 Pope Benny da 16th rocked up to Sydney for World Yoof Day.

For Elizabeth

For all your geography needs I give you..........

The Canada Jig Map!

Click for larger image

*Missing piece later found under the carpet LOL ! *

Nude, nekkid, bare basics of TGIF July 10

Did you remember to watch Ned Kelly Uncovered?
Would have been a rude awakening for the poor sod had he really been uncovered...somewhat akin to Captain Jack in Torchwood regenerating all nekkid and handcuffed and in full view...and nekkid...without clothes....nekkid....full frontal....handcuffed....did I mention he was without any covering?

1040 Speaking of nekkid.... Lady Godiva traipsed her nekkid form on horseback throughout the town of Coventry where all the good folk averted their eyes as a protest to her hubby's increased taxes.
Smart lass to choose the height of the British Summer to pull this stunt!

Has anyone noticed the tennis balls in the new Kit Kat ad - the ones the bloke spits out of his mouth like a tennis machine - are smaller than usual tennis balls?
I think that says a lot for men and their ball sports....

1864 Sir Austin Chapman - saddler, publican, storekeeper, investor, politician and auctioneer - was born in the illustrious town of ....drumroll....Bong Bong.
Go on, it's safe to click on the link, you won't have to inhale.

Muddy Waterholes - such an address brings drear images to ones mind; could one state their home town without calls of derision? No?
That might be the reason why it's now called Lethbridge, near Geelong in Victoria.

1869 The Old Duffer Rush ghostly occurrence took place near Young in NSW.
Go on, you know you want to click HERE to read more.

Don't go looking for Batman River to take a swim...in fact don't go swimming in the damn thing at all - better known these days as the upside down Yarra River.

1911 The Royal Australian Navy was formed on this day, with the day the fleet arrived in 1913 being declared a public holiday.... and if the navy is as buff and chiseled as those fine specimens on Sea Patrol they can form new chapters of the navy and have public holidays any day of the week if they so choose.
*waving hello to the ravishing readers from the Australian Defence Dept*

Should I be concerned that there is an actual online petition to get scenes of Captain Jack nekkid?
Or just smile, nod and add my name?
Yep, I thought you'd say that...

1967 Twas Decimal Currency Day in NZ when the coinage went decimal, when two dollars replaced 1 pound, when kids became "dollar scholars".
Awww, bless.
Now enjoy the Kiwi Decimal Currency Song HERE.

I don't think I need to point out that I highly doubt this Captain Jack action figure is anatomically correct.
His knees appear to be bending outwards at a painful angle...

1985 Owing to NZ and Greenpeace's protests over the French nuclear testing in the Pacific the Greenpeace ship The Rainbow Warrior was bombed in Auckland Harbour by French agents, which resulted in the death of one crew member.
More details HERE.

Recycled bits and bobs.....

I love Australia and Australians.
I love the grass roots level of politics where they can either make a complete balls up or get things perfectly right.
Woke up this morning to hear that a small town's ban on bottled water went to the vote and the people spoke loud and clear ; the ban is official.

Which has over-flowed (if you'll pardon the pun) to the NSW State Govt banning bottled water in the govt depts.
And so they bloody should 'lead by example'.
Those bottles need bajillions of litres of water to produce in the first place - go buy yourself a re-fillable bottle and use the good old tap water if you've got potable water.

Another small council has jacked up the rates for pokies venues - good on 'em!
Pokies have wrecked the local live band scene, many pubs/clubs have taken to relying on the dosh from the pokies rather than making an effort to entice punters to eat a meal or - Goddess forbid -  have a night out without having to share their space with blinking, screeching one armed bandits.
And that's not even mentioning the ruined lives from the gambling.
I vote for The Whitlams offer to Blow Up The Pokies.

In more exciting kitchen news - grab your frilly apron, Mavis - let's get down and dirty with a
Self Saucing Banananananananana Choc Hazelnut Pudding.

• Mash the buggery out of 4 bananas.
• Dump 1 cup of s/r flour into a mixing bowl with 1/2 cup of brown sugar, 1 teaspoon of bi carb of soda and mix.
• Then dribble in about 3 dessert spoons of that virginal oil, beat up 2 eggs and chuck 'em in then toss in the 'nanas.
• Mix, whip, beat till your hand turns blue, scrape it out into an oiled 3 litre casserole dish ( with matching lid).
• Scatter hazlenuts and chocolate chips willy-nilly over the top of the pudd.
  
• In a separate bowl drizzle as much Golden Syrup as your taste buds can handle, mix with 1/4 cup of brown sugar and 1 cup of boiling water, then pour it over the back of a spoon onto the pudd (this stops it from creating a hole in the pudd batter).
• Whack the lid on and bake for approx. 20-25 mins in a moderate oven.
• Serve hot with ice cream or cream or custard or just in its own sauce.
• Second and third helpings are fully allowed.
  

 

Mamma always swore by the powers of masking tape to stop those pesky limbs dropping off at the most inopportune moment.

Knitting, quilting and sewing ...oh. my.

Have been catching little bits of Eastenders on UKTV - who or what is Babs Windsor's character marrying?!
Nasty piece of work, that Archie, can we assume he gets his come-uppance soon-ish? Gawd, where's Brian with the goss when you need him!
Colonel Mustard with the lead pipe in the alleyway, perhaps?

 

For the Mooning One known as JahTeh over at the Coppery WitchyPoo's place.....

1863 Tree planting activities on this day in Christchurch saw the planting of an English Oak which was the beginning of the Botanic Gardens.
For more information click HERE.

Have you seen what I've been tempted with of late?
Have been wrestling with 4 double ended needles to knit myself some socks - but not turning for the heel coz if I can't turn for Angelina Jolie I aint turning for no piddly heel - when I read Dancing With Frogs.
And then my eyeballs fall out.
Go and look at Frog Dancer's blog, go on, and see how she's teased her readers with the beautiful quilts she effortlessly throws together in the blink of an eye!
So I found myself at my Second Home aka Spotlight ( no, I walked, left the tractor at home) fondling fat quarters and drooling over high thread counts on girly-girly patterned material.
I was strong and resisted, though.


1915 The railways refuse to employ single men as, in the opinion of the railway officials, "they should be serving at the front".
Yeah.
Every bastard was keen to chuck the callow youth as cannon fodder to the front.

But not only that!
Oh no, I wander over to Scott's Abode and there I'm confronted with a cute little retro felt pony to make.
So strong is the suggestion that I find myself in Spotlight buying BRIGHTLY coloured felt to make the prancing pony.
Go on, I dare you to cast your baby blues across Scott's pony and see if you can resist temptation!

1946 Best lead singer of AC/DC Bon Scott was pupped on this day in Kirriemuir in Scotland.
But it was his bluebird tattoos that mesmerised us the most....

But that's not nearly the end of it, ohhhhh nooooooooo.
You see, Marita often cross stitches and blogs about her lovely creations, sometimes with full technicolour photos to illustrate her work.
I used to cross stitch until my eyes fell out (see above) or was that when my eyesight went to Africa with my libido?
I digress.
Anyway now that I have my super-dooper uber-strength prescription reading glasses AND the magnifying glass my head was turned at Spotlight, yes again, when I spied some little cross stitch designs with the Aussie flag and wattle, possums rampant and gum nuts.

1986 The NZ Homosexual Law Reform Bill was passed.
For more details click HERE.

But now I must away to watch the second part of Torchwood: Children of Earth.

Because, as the ankle biters keep telling us - "we are coming....BACK."

On my daily walks.....

Are the 2000's to become the new 1960's, where any building older than 5 mins was considered rubbish,  as Art Deco architecture seems to be in the firing line of the wrecker's ball?
This chap is determined to obliterate his Art Deco house while the following two houses are in the process of being demolished for some *shudder* uber-modern angled concrete and steel contraptions that will stick out like dogs' balls in the soft surrounds of mid-1930's Art Deco style.

Each lovely, painstakingly created detail - like the feature bricks around the window, the brick trim near the eaves, the quirky little feature in the far left of the pic - is to be trashed.

 

Semi-detached villas, pic taken last Sunday both villas were piles of rubble as of last night. 

If one peers intently enough at this pic, whilst holding ones left leg behind ones right ear and chanting the theme to Mr Ed, one may spy the old Victorian Railways insignia, V/R, beneath all the jumble of paint rubbish.

For more info, history and heritage notes - not to forget some fantastic photos - of the old V/R click HERE.

 

The coffee shop (shed?) outside Murrumbeena station that tempts me with it's delightfully wafting aromas of coffee and Singapore noodles and pies and yummmmmm.

Perfect example of when Graffiti Artists Go Commercial.

No matter where a man ends up he will have his shed, even if it means building one atop a shop in downtown Murrumbeena....

July ate the eighth Ice Cream Sundae & Milk Chocolate with Almonds Day.

 

Oh good, you're awake now.
Come on, up off the floor, you can't lollygag about there all day.

It's the Feast Day of St Peter the Hermit.
You don't find that on resumes much these days; "past employment - Hermit".
Pity that fun job was wasted on men back in the dim dark ages.
I'd like to be a hermit.
I hear the pay's lousy but all the pigeons you can eat....

1872 Today saw the issue of the first 40,000 sovereigns from the Victorian Mint.

It's Ice Cream Sundae Day.
And if that doesn't tickle your fancy it's also Milk Chocolate with Almonds Day.
If you're a hard-to-please sod then how about Be A Kid Day?
Just so as I can ground you, send you to your room without any sweets and draw all over your homework folder myself to save you the trouble eat your share of the Ice Cream Sundaes.

1893 To have some control over the thoroughbred racing industry the NZ Racing Conference was established.

The seventh day of the seventh month bladdy blah blah

Oh, look!
July 7th already....where did that sneak up from...?
I shall ponder this puzzle as I trundle my way to Carnegie - probably darkening the doorstep of Scott only briefly on my travels - and enjoying the aroma of fresh coffee, Singapore noodles and hot pies wafting oh-so-delicately from the coffee shop outside Murrumbeena station whilst drooling not too subtly over the Porsche 911 a little further along in Neerim Rd.
Should I mention that the person choofing on a bong in their front garden in Neerim Rd is really pushing their luck? Even Michael Phelps would have thought twice about sitting amidst the mulch and inhaling as blatantly as this person was doing.
It wasn't patchouli oil that was stinking up the street yesterday and I'm not too certain it was just the exercise that was giving me the munchies....
I forgot to blog that I met up with the lovely Marita and her two girls last Wednesday!
Had a fab time with them and Feral Beast enjoyed himself greatly.

1456 They finally got around to finding Joan of Arc innocent.
Yeah, 25 years after they barbecued her.

1846 Livingstone Hopkins, celebrated cartoon artist of The Bulletin, was pupped on this day.
Read more about him HERE.

Nothing to do with Livingston Hopkins but a tram-fan pic for Andrew.

And now imagine that green and yellow paint used on the oh-so-abused walls of Labassa only a little way from this stop....

1924 In the film Chariots of Fire "Tom Watson" won bronze for NZ but in reality it was Arthur Porritt who took home Bronze from the Paris Olympics.
More detail on Baron Porritt, former Gov-Gen HERE.

1961 For once it wasn't the King Street nightclubbing gals who were collapsing, all tired and emtional, it was the Kings Street Bridge itself.

Air con, old school.

1980 GLBT protesters picketed the Soviet Embassy in Wellington in support of Enzo Francone who had chained himself to the railings outside the Kremlin during the Moscow Olympics.
Brave boy!
Silly, but brave!

Food, weight loss & exercise, oops don't mention the war, Basil!

Was reading The Hun about how kids are ripe for diabetes and strokes by the age of 14 (click HERE to read article) but, shhhh, don't tell anyone I mentioned it in case a rude reader has a hissy fit, again.
On my daily walk from Oakleigh to Carnegie (oh noez. my stalker will figure out what suburb I live in. tsk) I inhaled so many delicious cooking smells - yes, at 9am- I swear I breathed in the kilos.
Goodness, should I mention the word kilos or walking?
Roast pork, roast chook - or should I just avoid the house where the bloke encourages the pigeons to hang around? - pies, noodles, etc.
Whatever happened to good old bacon and bum nuts on toast with mushies and tomatoes? (that's tom-AR-toes, not tom-ATE-toes).
Stepped onto some scales last week and the scales said I'd lost 4 kilos.
Either those scales lied or I found those 4 kilos damn fast inside a week.
Oops, there I go again, mentioning weight loss. Tsk,tsk, how dare I.
Snacking on mandarins and Granny Smiths have added extra bonuses; the gas propulsion won't exactly push you along but it will encourage you to get away from groups of people...in case you blast them out of their socks.
Now, I'll either start looking like a piece of fruit or there'll be a small hole in the Ozone layer above my house for my stalker to find me more easily than traipsing back and forth across 4 suburbs looking for my aromatic trail.
Bon Appetit!

Celebrate, peoples ! It's CHOCOLATE DAY!

It's Chocolate Day today!!!!
Well....it's actually tomorrow but as there's nothing else happening and it's Chocolate! we're talking about here I figured we could probably do justice to the Chocolate! celebrations by spreading them out over 2 Chocolate! days.

1835 The wild white escapee, William Buckley, met up with Chocolate! John Batman and his mates at Indented Head in Port Phillip.

1923 The North Island Main Trunk railway line experienced a fatal collision when the Auckland- Wellington Express rounded a bend and hit a landslip.
More details and info HERE.

1943 Darwin was bombed...again.

1945 Forde was sworn in as the care-taker PM on the sudden death of John Curtin.

1964 Malawi became independent from Britain.
Such a roaring success that's been, too, eh?
Just ask the orphans Madge hasn't yet adopted....

1973  With 60 women in attendance the Radicalesbian Conference got underway in Sorrento, Victoria.
Sorry, was that the redneck up Rye back beach choking on his Chocolate! weeties...?

1985 A Chocolate! UFO was seen near Chocolate! Stonehenge with Chocolate! crop circles found shortly afterwards.
Damn bloody Chocolate! extra terrestrials and their poor hearing.
I said "Pick me up in 5" not "Pick me up in 1985".
Been stuck here since Neanderthals discovered a use for cow dung and there's still some blokes wandering about today who have not the foggiest.....

 

Flappers were very prone to sniffles as they refused to wear long johns under their frocks.

Is it the man come to take me away, why do they follow me?

Having watched The Squiz last night - it makes me actually enjoy sport - I was impressed to hear former children's presenter chicky babe Charli offer to begin pole dancing.
I think a large number of the male audience members were equally, if not more, impressed.

And if you're not watching RocKwiz you're depriving yourself of a decent half hour before the Horlicks kicks in and the fluffy bed-socks tear you to the toasty warm goodness that is the hot water bottle tucked into your blankies.
Hmmmm Horlicks.....
Bed-socks....
Hot water bottles....
Blankies....

1881 Similar to the Port Phillip Colony, who went into witness protection to become Victoria (oops), NZ imposed a tax of £10 per head on Chinese immigrants as the anti-Chinese feeling grew on the goldfields.
For more details or to search the online poll tax records click HERE.

1883 The wowsers in Vic Parliament won by a whisker when they voted to make that Den of Iniquity, the National Gallery of Victoria, to close on Sundays.
*cue sarcastic golf clap from on high*

1945 PM John Curtin, who'd got the Land of Oz through some of the worst moments of WW2, died at The Lodge in Canberra.
For some fab info into this generally nice bloke click HERE and HERE.

1975 Television Two held the first televised telethon in the Land of The Kiwi.

Nice to see Melbourne Demons pull a convincing win out of nowhere to boost Jim Stynes morale.

You may take your combine harvester and....drop it round the back of my place, ta.

I bought a tractor.
Yes, you could say it was an impulse buy...sort of.
I had seen it advertised and was interested in looking at it more so I wandered on down to where it was parked and snapped it up.
It's a 1947 Massey Ferguson, one of those cute little work-horses that never say die.
You can see a pic of it HERE.
I shall be clearing something, possibly The Spouse, out to make way for the tractor collection....


Today is the Feast Day of the Roman Goddess of Peace, Pax.
Yep, typical....a chick is the one to calm ruffled feathers and it's her Feast Day when some turd lets loose some missiles to make up for his Small-Dick-Man Syndrome.

1868 Te Kooti and a mere 300 of his devoted followers nabbed a schooner titled Rifleman and did a bunk from the Chathams to NZ  where they pitched up at Whareongonga only a week later.
More info HERE.

Have you heard the exciting news that they've found 3 NEW Aussie dinosaurs in Qld?
Woot!!!!
And this Thursday ABC will air the Ned Kelly doco special Tony Robinson filmed during a recent archaeology dig of the Glenrowan pub.
Double Woot!!!

1902 Getting those pesky housewives off the streets and out of mischief the New Zealand Boxing Association was established in Christchurch.
More info HERE.

NAIDOC Week begins tomorrow, for details and information click HERE.

1984 Heavy snowfalls on this day saw roads and train lines blocked in Eastern Oz while Sydney revelled in it's coldest July day since 1896.

Once Twice upon a time, during the Spanish Influenza outbreak and WW2, to travel between states in the Land of Oz one needed a permit, had to admit what purpose brought one across the border and had to announce how long one intended to darken the doorstep of the foreign state....

A 5 minute tram service?! Sir, I declare you must be stark raving mad!

Proof that the more things change the more they stay the same...especially when it comes to Melbourne's public transport...

From The Argus, Saturday 3rd July, 1926
So, Daniel, what are the service times of trams during peak hour these days...?

It's Chocolate Wafer Day, so go dine on those yummy wafers!

1850 Tired of wearing out their shoe leather they finally started work on NSW's first railway line from Sydney to Parramatta.

1872 William Thorn, first white kid pupped in Victoria, dropped off the twig at the not-so-kid-like age of 88.

1947 Sweetness was once again to be had when sugar rationing ended.

1950 And then we had something to sweeten when tea rationing finished.

1963 Helicopters were first used in search and rescue when a DC-3 aeroplane crashed in Kaimai Range which is still considered NZ's worst civil aviation accident.
More information about it HERE.

Somehow I don't think the station was in its current condition (click HERE) when they were celebrating the pomp and ceremony hoopla.

99 bottles of beer on the wall, 99 gottles of gear....*hic*

One is considerably excited as one's Bois are arriving in Melbourne on July 17th.
Yes, again!
*Squeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee*
One shall be galivanting all over the shop and behaving in a manner better suited to a tipsy groupie of somewhat younger years but, honestly, who gives a fat rats' clacker if I behave or not?
One is planning one's social downfall (for the umpteenth time) in glorious technicolour for the tabloid entertainment splashy spread.
Don't worry, I'll save you a copy if you happen to be out of the country that month.....

1851 A shepherd couldn't help but brag about the gold shiny stuff he found near Ballaarat (no, not a spelling error)  and, woops, there goes the neighbourhood.
And that, boys and girls, is why you should only entrust your deepest darkest secrets to your pet Nanny goat.

 

Seriously, this could be the answer to so many footy teams' desperate prayers...

1938 The Wellington trains were electrified!
No, seriously, a sparky time was had by all.
More HERE.

 

Through an unfortunate misprint in 1926 flipping the birdie took on a life of it's own in men's fashion circles....

1965 Victorian secondary school teachers hadn't had a decent strike since 1920.
So, they ended the drought.

Probably with psychadelic funk on the record player, some lurve beads draped about their necks and some patchouli oil stinking up the street; those school kids had no idea what they were missing.

I'm impressed.

In my day nurses only presented half-full bed pans...where did this lot pull the white marble from?!

2006 Ngati Toa was given the Big Rejection by the Intellectual Property Office when they tried to trade mark the Haka as performed by the All Blacks.
But earlier this year they succeeded.

 

With men fully occupied in what comes out of their hen's backsides it leaves no room for war mongering of any description...