Saturday, January 2, 2010

Earth shattering news....

The next person trying to act like Brown's cows in my path at Chaddy ( or any other shopping area that holds more than 5 people and a wet shaggy haired mutt) will be run over by the slightly cracked old cat lady with the maniacal glint in her eye.
Failing that I promise to snaggle on my talon any small child let run amok by its parents; the child will then either be returned to sender with insufficient postage or go the way of all Hansel and Gretel kids....right after I re-tuck the edges of my gingerbread house.
And stock up on sweet chili sauce.
Yes, it's true what they say about old crones and witches.
Parents, please be considerate and pack extra napkins with your feral darlings.
Oh and the news is....KMart is all out of SodaStream drink makers, Target has NFI what I'm talking about and the blokes in Coles thought I wanted soda water (and that I had 2 heads but we'll let that last one slide....for now).


  1. Do not get me started on kids in shopping centers!
    What the hell are parents thinking? Clearly they're not I guess.
    They run riot and do what they want all while Mummy and Daddy are having a chat in the middle of the bloody walk way, making arrangements for next weeks coffee date.
    It makes you wonder how they behave at home doesn't it?
    As to the 15 year olds in the department stores, my poor husband won't come shopping with me any more because I have a habit of lecturing them on their lack of product knowledge when they give me the deer in the head lights look should I be silly enough to ask a question....
    Getting old I think....

  2. This is the reason why I shop at night by my own self and so I won't forget the toothpaste or something that is vital....yeah... child free shopping !

  3. Now, now Jayne...those annoying kids might be suffering from autism or some other such problem, and just need the average shopper to relax, reconsider and take stock before having a you went to great lengths to point out to us a number of postings back.

    Fuse lit, retire to a safe distance (say 25,000 miles) at a very fast speed.)

  4. I've seen what some are like in their native environment, Mo, and it aint pretty :P

    OMG the amount of things I used to forget when the girls were little, Cazzie...much more civilised without 'em ;)

    LMFAO Brian.
    Auties having a meltdown is a tad different to some rugrat pushing their friends over in the path of other shoppers/running amok with their parents shopping and throwing it from the upper levels of the atrium down 1 storey or letting the little darlings rip open packets of food in the supermarket, eat it then shove the empty packet on a shelf and leave without paying for it - all the while the parental unit is condoning this behaviour.
    Slightly different to a child holding his hands over his ears and screaming in pain.
    I can see 2010 is going to be a whizz bang year for you :P

  5. Me thinks Brian has a death wish... lol.

    I will have you know that my two Autistic children and one Neuro Typical child are constantly being praised for how well behaved they are when out in shops and the like. **gloat, gloat**

    You would LOVE shopping with us Jayne baby.

    I am going to be getting a soda stream too. We could make Coven recipes, lol.

  6. ahh sorry - the feral brats would be mine. (Actually, they are pretty good at the shops unless we bring the husband).
    ...and I walked past a stack of soda streams at k-mart this morning....

  7. They have no idea what you mean by a soda stream? Take along a picture. It's entirely possible that the young'uns have no product knowledge because they've been hired on as christmas casuals and haven't been there long enough or often enough to learn the entire range. Go easy on them Jayne. Until you've been seeing the same blank faces for a month at least.

  8. I know your kids behave, Nikki, cos you're a sensible woman ;)

    Ditto to you, too, Amanda and, yes, men seem to make kids silly.
    Our KMart sold out of them and haven't restocked them yet, I'll wait a little longer lol.

  9. LOL
    River, I'm talking about shop assistants in their 30's and 40's !