Friday, March 25, 2011

I give up! And I'm frigging bloody happy!

It's been on my mind and someone asked about it today....
I've come home and taken one look at the damn exercise bike glowering at me from the corner of the dining room (boring holes in my back with it's sneer even as I sit here) and I feel no compunction to climb aboard.
I have averaged 4 hours or more every day on the damn thing (I even ended up with pressure sores at one point, I kid you not) - nada.
Not a frigging gram of weight did I shift.

I have done my damndest for over 18 months to get my weight under control yet the scales have edged upwards into triple figures - no, it's not muscle weighing more than fat in my case although I so wish it was (and tried to kid myself with that old chestnut for a while) as I've gone from size 16 up to size 22 almost into 24.

I've tried gobbling nothing but fruit, steamed vegies, salads and steamed chicken and fish for weeks and months until I felt like a piece of rainforest vegetation - zilch.
I've then gone without white carb foods, even sacrificed my beloved Woolies Home Brand Sour Cream and Onion flavoured chippies, gone the sweet spud route, no pasta, rice, noodles, etc, et nothing after 6pm except black unsweetened tea - nothing.

I've tried a couple of diets with set menus - on one I thought I'd lost 6 kgs on but it turns out one really can put back on 6 litres of fluid overnight when one is going through menopause.
Gotta love menopause - when hormones can turn a chick into a homocidal maniac WITHOUT the incentive of added weight.

I've had 3 GPs tell me I'm obese - yes, I swear to the Goddess I've been told that, if you don't believe me take it up with then - and to 'stop indulging in junk food' despite me telling them I eat up to 7 steamed vegies with a tiny piece of fat-free steamed fish/chicken 6 nights a week with gallons of fruit and water, sans salt and sugar.

I did not partake of any alcoholic beverages until I recently got my Meniere's diagnosis last December - in my wisdom I figured if I was going to fall sideways and look tipsy I may as well have some enjoyment and earn that damn accusation so I get jiggy with it on 1 can of beer/2-3 G&Ts 3 times per week - nothing which can be blamed for my weight gain.

And seriously, by this point I'd had a good long look at my spartan diet and looked at the growing barge arse and thought "Fuck it".

 I'm here to say I waver between 107 - 115 kgs (depending on the fluid retention for the day) and I really don't give a fat rat's clacker anymore.
*tip toes over and covers the hulking bike with a pretty floral bedsheet....*

Photobucket
Kelley's tat... still tatting, 6 days on....and counting...

10 comments:

Ðéví said...

Oooooh. *looks at feet, like a naughty little girl* I didn't mean to stir up a hornets nest.

I never lost any weight until I was diagnosed with the allergies, treated for scoliosis and later took up circus cos all other forms of exercise made me cry with misery.

I hate exercise bikes. They hurt and aren't fun.

Can you go swimming? Cos that's fun!

*I think it's becoming obvious that I had a revelation last year that the only good part of life is when it's fun, so now I seek out the fun parts, after having done my duties*

Love and popping over with mallet and pickaxe for a fun day of "let's show the bike some luv!"

Being Me said...

Hey. Hey, WOW. This sounds so similar to me. It felt like exercising made me gain MORE weight (certainly more fluid), it has been the most debilitating, confusing, frustrating thing. I'm so sorry you're going through it too.

Honest to goodness, I have only recently started to drop weight. I was pushing the lower end of your lowest fluctuating weight and I can take on water like the Titanic (strange). Recently I did a big detox for 2 weeks after a full series of blood tests, plus changed the way I ate - I had fallen into a terrible trap of not eating. The NOT eating was making me gain weight and never lose it, everything was shot to pieces. Now, I force myself to eat and I am losing weight now that I am eating more often... it's been a bizarre eye opener.

Not to sound preachy or converty, but if you go to my blog, check out the right hand sidebar - I reckon the naturopaths on those links might be able to get you sorted. And it's all an online thing.

So far I've lost around 8kg and, being all fluid, the change has been dramatic - and I haven't even been on my stupid bike to do it (yet)! I plan to increase my exercise sometime... soon. No, really.

scottsabode said...

I reckon GPs exacerbate the situation - they give me white coat hypertension ie. normal blood pressure at home and then up thirty points with their meanness. Just makes you end up feeling worse about it all rather than supported!

River said...

You don't look at all fat Jayne. You are tall however and I'd have to say some of that weight is bones. I think most people need to ignore what the scales say and remember that bones and internal organs all weigh something which naturally contributes to our overall weight. As long as you stay healthy there's not much to worry about really.

Andrew said...

You didn't look fat when I met you. Oh, that was quite a while ago. Sensible eating is good. Have enough of the good stuff, surely it balances out the bad stuff. I read recently that smoking can be good for weight loss. Models recommend it. Health authorities don't.

Janine said...

Good on you for not giving a fat rat's clacker. Its so freaking frustrating more so when you put in a 110% effort. At the end of the day as long as you are happy and you are banish the dam cycle and heck grab yourself a pack of those Sour Cream and Onion flavoured chippies.

Windsmoke. said...

Six years ago i had chest pains like some one lit a bonfire in my chest. Went to the doctor and found out i was 30 kilos overweight at a 103 kilos had a cholesterol reading off the scale and he said lose the weight or you'll die young. Six months later i lost the 30 kilos and now weight 73 kilos no more chest pains and have a normal cholestrol level. There's still hope for you if you put in the effort like i did :-).

Nikki aka Widdle Shamrock said...

Me too Jayne !!!! No matter what I do, the weight won't shift. It is so disheartening.

Congrats on the weightloss Windsmoke, though I don't understand where you think Jayne hasn't put in any effort.

JahTeh said...

Make that two rats clackers.
Don't bother with 'Lite n Easy', for a 1200 kilojoule diet it was $281 for a week and that's for 3 meals.
Considering the stress levels you operate under, I'm surprised you haven't blown a foofoo valve by now.
My weight loss tip, weigh with the scales on carpet then two days later use the same scales on the bathroom floor, 2kgs better and works every time.

frogpondsrock said...

You didn't look fat to me Jayne, Tall yes but certainly not fat :)

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