Seems Charlie Grimes popped into Port Phillip (which wasn't Port Phillip at the time but probably labouring under its own moniker now long lost in the mists of time), cast his pithy baby blues over the Mornington Peninsula and declared, "I am soooo not redecorating this place!" before tattling to Gov King how he just didn't do sandy soil for settlements.
The lack of fresh water may have had some bearing on it, too.
Best not let on to the swarms of tourists and residents of the Mornington Peninsula that its unsuitable for settlement!
They had a proper knees up, Mother Brown at the Melbourne Town Hall with a banquet to kick off the third and (at long last!) final session of the National Australasian Convention (where the delegates agreed on drafting the Constitution Bill...but not before they dragged it out until the 17th March).
But the banquet...!
Prawn cocktail for starters, anyone?
More wine, sir, to cope with the boring old fart to your immediate left?
Perhaps the gents would like to retire with cigars and port to escape the harpies screeching about the ridiculous notion of the female right to vote?
Yes, madame, Melbourne does boast its share of quality male lap dancing clubs, would you like me to recommend one to your party?
Now, to poke, prod and generally annoy the spouse until he starts work on the decking.